i talk about music a lot, & have a tendency to post songs that are stuck in my head in the hope that they will get stuck in your head instead. you're welcome.
I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS. Also, what does Jess think about them?
carol takes video of them attacking clint and emails it to her, so jess is probably on board.
(we also decided that the unicorns love pepper because her shoes make her sound like one of them. she likes them one or two at a time, but can’t handle the whole herd following her around and trying to match her pace so they all make the same noises. tony makes her shoes that look like little unicorns but assures everyone that they are DEFINITELY FAKE, DEFINITELY before thor, steve, and kit can kick his ass. (in that order.) (kit’s definitely the scariest of that bunch.) pepper refuses to wear them.)
(natasha tries to teach the unicorns stealth and uses clint as bait to gauge how far they’ve come in their training. clint does not like this game at all.)
It’s not important how lisapizza and I decided Avengers Tower should be filled with tiny unicorns.
It is, however, very important to consider Thor being followed around by a herd of tiny unicorns, calling them all “NOBLE STEED” and “MIGHTY BEAST” and occasionally carrying them under each arm. They keep stabbing Clint in the shins and he starts wearing shinguards. (Tony totally taught them to do it.)
Natasha teaches them to bring her things on their horns, and Bruce uses them to pass notes. Steve names them all and is the only one who can tell them apart. Carol thinks they’re a little unsettling, but she brings Kit over and Kit loses her tiny little mind over them. Way better than My Little Pony. (Kit asks if she can keep one and Thor says such noble beasts cannot be owned, but they can be her friends.) (Kit’s mom is thankful.)
Bucky comes up in the elevator and hears a strange thundering noise, and the door opens to a wide semicircle of tiny unicorns, all staring at him. They follow him everywhere in perfect silence, keeping their distance. Kate thinks they’re great - remind her of a birthday party she had when she was seven - and wants to know if she can rent them out. Maria Hill thinks this is absolutely fucking ridiculous and Tony shrugs and asks Pipsqueak to bring him a donut.
Whenever Coulson comes over, the unicorns all hide. He doesn’t believe they exist.
(And Nick Fury keeps one in his office, where it sleeps in a desk drawer and plays in one of those miniature desk sand gardens.)