Hey I uh, I read in the paper today that it’s uh, National Prayer Day. So we thought it would be uh, maybe tonight’s the night to make the big announce that we’re going to uh, apply officially to the United States government and uh, have our band considered a legitimate religion. Stone suggested it’d be great, we’d be tax-exempt, we could do a lot with that money. Good things, because sometimes the government doesn’t seem to put it where it’s supposed to go. And uh, there’s only one commandment, and it’s easy to remember, and it’s uh, “Don’t be an asshole.” Stone came up with that. He’s kind of our leader. He’s really the Jesus of the bunch. I might look like him, but he’s really the one. And you know, it’s a pretty open religion, you can pretty much do whatever the fuck you want. Mind you, we come up with this whole religion thing just on the bus ride over here today. We need to think it through a little bit more. But so far, the only thing that is forbidden, the only one thing—can’t fucking Twitter. Hate that shit.
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